You Never Know What the Future Holds

Hi again,

My guess is at this point nobody reads this which is perfectly fine actually. So here I am over 11 months of inactivity on my blog. December 17th of 2016. Of course I can't type every change that has gone on in my life since then, but let me hit some main points.

Lists are easy right? Well kind of.

Lows:
- thought I fell in love again and got my heart broken as usual
- my ex pops up in my nightmares
- blew up on my therapist of 2+ years (this may be a positive thing)
- almost/kind of lost my job
- i got into a crash on my motorcycle and scared my mom
- a family member died
- drank before bed for many days in a row

Highs:
- changed my views on dating and had fun being young
- got all As for my first full semester back in college
- won a nail award!
- got back on my bike
- gained weight (finally over 100!)
- said yes to a date
- said yes to be his girlfriend
- took a risk and bought matching personalized rings


Let me elaborate more on this guy aka Penguin. I had finally decided I would change how I viewed dating to protect my heart and have fun. I used to date to find a potential future husband which some may consider silly considering I am only 22 years young. I looked at dating as a wavy to have fun, meet people, and destress. That's when I matched with Penguin. He fit most of the items on my list of must haves, but I wasn't very hopeful that we would match, let alone work out. In some of his photos he looked like he could be a total jerk, but when I went on the bike night date with him I quickly realized that wasn't the case.

Anybody that knows me understands that I am more negative than positive. Well, Penguin was 100% positive, happy, fun, high energy. I swear I thought he was on drugs! I even asked a couple of his friends if this was the real him which they confirmed. I didn't take to him very well at first, but I began to accept his personality and overall vibe. I figured it may be good for me to have him in my life. We dated from the end of February till the end of July during which he had asked me to be his girlfriend multiples time. Of course I said no every time he asked. I also explained why I was saying no to make sure I wasn't hurting his feelings or giving him the wrong impression. Poor guy lol But he kept his hopes high and acted as if nothing had happened! I don't know how he managed, but I am glad he did.

On July 29, 2017 my close friend, his date, Penguin and I headed to LA to check out the infinity room at the Broad. That light room is so magical! It's a bummer they limit your time in the room to seconds. I mean we waited over four hours for like 30-45 seconds! That's insane!! While we were waiting the four of us squished into my friend's Fiat and had lunch in Little Tokyo. After the museum my friend and his date headed home while Penguin and I rode to Malibu to Point Dume to watch the (nonexistent) sunset! Of course I knew days before that he was planning to once again ask me out. We got to the cliff and enjoyed the view and some fries . . . lol of course! He asked me to be his girlfriend and this time I said yes! Well I actually said maybe then I said yes! Not sure how many months prior that I had planned this, but I dropped a pin on the exact location to note the longitude and latitude.

Fast forward, I got our thumb prints, ring sizes, anniversary date, and location together and placed the order for our rings. I was so worried he wouldn't like it or that he wouldn't wear them. They aren't promise rings to get married, but rings to serve as a reminder of that special day and a promise that I will try my best in the relationship. I knew it would be cool to have matching rings with someone special, but I didn't know how tingly it would make me feel inside. Seeing him wear the ring I bought made me feel a deeper level of connection to him.

My life has been a bit of a mess or a crazy roller coaster ride for many years, but I feel like it has calmed down a bit. The nightmares of my ex have grown scarce, my busy dating schedule is no more (keeping track of who's who and when you have time is more draining than you would think), I am slowly learning how to handle my motorcycle, I am trying to be a happier person, and I am trying to enjoy life as we all should.

Tomorrow morning I head out to the desert with my Penguin for track day! This will be the second time I go to a track to support him. It's definitely something new for me to see so many bikers going top speeds in a safe environment. Plus I love seeing him ride!

Thanksgiving has come and gone. It was probably the most interesting one to date. My aunt and cousin attended, my aunt has to walk with a cane (temporarily), I saw my Granddad for the first time in many many years, my mom made jello shots (my second time having jell shots and our first time having alcohol at Thanksgiving!)and it was Penguin's first Thanksgiving with us!

Christmas should be a lot of fun this year! Before I can enjoy Christmas I have to get through the semester. Can't say I like school but I am managing. Definitely looking forward to our trip in December. My last two Vegas trips didn't go too well. One guy paid more attention to his dog and beer which isn't the best way to spend a "couple's trip". The most recent trip I got pretty messed up but luckily just had a bad headache for four days...not my idea of a fun trip soooo that's why we're trying round two! This time we'll have fun and go out and of course limit the alcohol.

On a different note, I would like to get back to blogging because my therapist and I think writing will help with my overall health. I also enjoy looking back at how far I have come. Looking at the big picture makes me feel like I am walking in the right direction, making smarter choices, and growing as a young women.

I hope you had a Happy Thanksgiving.

-ALG

PS
     Welcome to the blog Penguin!